Peter Parker's Pranks
by CalmIsOverrated
Summary: Say that ten times fast. A documentation of the many pranks Peter pulls on the Avengers that almost always backfire or end spectacularly! The poor Avengers never expected this when they agreed to have Peter over after school and every other weekend. But one things for sure, Peter Parker is a little troll. (Has a lot more characters than listed)
1. Episode I

The camera screen fizzles to life showing the face of a youthful boy with fluffy brown hair and chocolate eyes. He looks away nervously and bites his lip before he shifts. Ho opens his mouth and begins his obviously scripted introduction.

"Hello, I am Peter Man," he paled (well, he tried). "I mean Spider-Parker- I mean - You know what, I give up." He looked offscreen. "Ned, you do this."

"How did you ever manage to keep an identity as long as you did, Pete?" The screen turned to face an Asian boy who looked exasperated. His feet were kicked up on a desk. There were stray papers, that looked like homework scattered, scattered around him. His feet however were carefully avoiding all of of them.

The walls behind him were a pleasant light gray and several large posters decorated them. In the large windowsill that looked out over the city was a tiny cactus which had a single, yellow flower on it.

"You tell me," Peter Man said sarcastically, pushing his stubborn hair out of his eyes. He was a really bad liar when it came down to it. He did fine before Tony. Now though, all the Avengers, his Aunt, and two friends knew. May said she blamed being around Tony's ego too long for that fact.

Since that (very loud) night when Aunt May figured out about Spider-man it didn't take long for MJ to reveal she too knew his not-so-well-guarded secret. Unfortunately the reason was a break-in involving guns and his top priority was to protect his friends. MJ shooed him away with a 'Don't get shot, Spider-man' to deal with the situation. He got it all resolved with no fatalities. They got sent home early and he was able to avoid her. But the next day she cornered him between his classes. MJ just gave him her number and told him to keep her updated.

"Right, you didn't," he snickered to the other before turning back. "I'm Ned, and that's Peter."

"We'll just edit out that part later," Peter said, though it was muffled as Ned's hand went over the microphone.

"No we won't," he said, spinning in the chair before abruptly stopping. "Oh, wait. Should we say what we're doing?"

Peter paused. "Yes. Welcome to Peter Parker's Pranks. And I am your host, Peter."

"Hey, what about me?"

"You're the guest star, Ned. Think MJ would join me on here?"

He huffed. "Maybe. Probably not though. I still can't _believe_ we're doing this," he somehow managed to sound both amused and disappointed at the same time. "You're going to get us kicked out. And why are we filming this?"

He gasps in mock surprise. "First off, Mr. Stark would never let them. He loves me too much. And second, memories Ned. Memories. One day we'll look back on our teenhoods and say 'I pranked Tony Stark'. And no one will believe us, but, we'll have proof!"

"Your dad-" "He's _not_ my dad, Ned." "-may have a soft spot for you, but not for me. I don't think he's liked me much since I hacked your suit."

"That's not true... After, I explained I forced you too."

Ned rolled his eyes. "Let's just get this over with already," he said.

"You can't rush perfection. FRI, when does Mr. Stark get home?" The camera turned to Peter who was looking up at the ceiling.

"Based on his current speed and location I estimate you have less than fifteen minutes," came the female voice. "I suggest you hurry if you want to pull of your prank, Mr. Parker.

Peter's eyes widened and he took off.

"Hey! Wait up!" Ned yelled as he scrambled to stand and follow. The screen goes shaky as they're running. When it comes back into focus it shows Peter's slightly red face. He's breathing like he just ran halfway across the building, which he did.

"Where should we set it?" He asks and Ned enters the picture briefly. He's panting harder than Peter (damn mutant best friends), sweat showing on his brows.

"Web it to the corner of that wall over there," he says between pants and points.

Peter nods twice and his brown eyes narrow in concentration. Before he rears his arm back and tosses the camera into the air with a, "Yeet!"

The screen flips there's a _thwip_ behind it and it stays hooked to the wall like a security camera. It looked down on the two teens with a good view on the hallway.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Ned asks as he stares at the camera. Not even phased by Peter's quoting. He's used to it by now.

"Yes," Peter says, a wicked grin appearing on his face. Ned simply shakes his head. "This is going to end so badly isn't it?"

"Not if it all goes according to the plan," he says rubbing his hands together.

"You," he poked Peter in the ribs (he mock-offendedly slaps Ned's hand away), "are a troll. Now lets set the trap and scram."

"Yes." Then he points to the camera, "We'll be right back."

The video cuts to an empty hallway, and everything _looks_ normal so far.

The elevator _dinged_ and Tony Stark in a clean new suit stepped out onto the floor he shared with Pepper, Rhodey, and now sometimes Peter.

Unsuspecting of what lay ahead, he started walking down the hall with his Starkpad in hand. Busily working on some new upgrade he'd probably go over with Peter later.

Suddenly Tony jerked back, landing flat on the ground. His Starkpad clattered to the ground besides him, thankfully landing screen-up. It was as if he had slammed right into an _invisible wall_.

He blinked dazedly and pushed himself up. His eyes narrowed in understanding as he saw the barricade better from this angle. He rested his hand on the wall of Inviso-wrap. He looked around, the hall as if waiting for someone (a certain Hawk known for pranking most likely) to jump out and yelled 'PRANKED'.

He rolled his eyes at the inconvenience and looked for a way around through another door. The first he opened and tried to walk through proved just as impossible. Every entrance, except the elevator, was barred with Inviso-wrap like a dead-end funnel. He tried pushing it down to get through but it was strongly glued to the walls.

 _Glued_.

Finally he looked up and around the ceiling, probably expecting to see the mischievous teen responsible. Instead his eyes landed right on the camera. He silently shot the bird as his other hand grabbed the fallen Starkpad and started heading the opposite way. Unaware they'd wrapped off every entrance and the glue wouldn't wear for another half hour... Which was well before Pepper or the others got home.

Shortly after, from off the screen, a yell was heard, "PARKER! I SWEAR TO GOD-!"

The video cuts again. This time to a breathless Peter and Ned.

The latter though, was behind Peter, rolling on the floor with laughter. They were in a different room than the last. Likely hiding for the time being.

"I-" He breaks out in laughter but manages to compose himself. "I r-regret nothing!"

Though he's sure Tony regrets allowing Peter to be unsupervised in the Tower while he went to his meetings. Bad things seemed to happen when Peter got bored. The brunette sighed, wiping away a fake tear and reached up to stop the video.

The screen goes black with the captions ' **Until Next Time** '.

~•~0~•~

 _And, y'know. They never did edit that part out._

 _This whole thing is crack. Read if you want. Idk. It's terribly OOC and just terrible. It's so bad. Why am I publishing this? Pre-IW. Please ignore my mistakes will edit later. I might also be putting this up on Wattpad but I'm publishing it on here, tonight._ _I might not even keep it._

 _Word: 1,200 They're kinda short but each will be a prank one-shot. May have two-parters (like if there's a revenge sequel). Suggestions are very much welcomed_.


	2. Episode II

The video started. This time in a crowded classroom, a teacher was lecturing about something. The screen was discreetly hidden behind the desk, half the picture covered. In front of the camera was Ned.

"Ned," the cameraman- though it's fair to assume it's Peter- hissed while jabbing a finger in the boy's back. "Ned." _Poke._ "Ned." _Poke._

"What?" The other snapped quietly, turning halfway in his seat.

"I have an idea," Peter's hand waved at the camera.

"No. I'm not helping you kill yourself again for a few laughs."

"C'mon Ned, it wasn't _that_ bad," the other countered.

Ned raised an eyebrow and opened his mouth to counter that is _was_ in fact that bad but say the teacher glancing at the two of them. "Turn that off before you get caught."

The camera turned to look up at Peter who rolled his eyes. Then a sly grin took over his face. The video cuts off. When it comes back, Peter is in front of the highschool sitting on a bench with a young African American girl his age who's nose was in a book.

"MJ, _pleeaassee_ help me," Peter says dragging out the syllables.

"No. Have Ned help you, loser," the girl- MJ- said, not glancing up at the puppy eyes Peter was using.

"He said he didn't want to help me and he sucks at cooking," Peter admitted.

"And you came to me to help you cook up some concoction, because I'm a girl?" She asked, honestly just trying to get out of this by this point.

"Nooo, you're the only other person who can help me," Peter whined.

"What about your Aunt?"

"Out of town. She's helping her friend, who broke her hip or something," Peter explained. Mentally adding that her food seemed to be able to take on a life of it's own and one time her tuna casserole _growled_ at him. "But she's coming back today and then taking me home. So I need to pull this prank before I leave."

MJ bit her lip as she tried to find an excuse to get out of this. "I have a thing later. A dentist appointment."

"The dentist offices close at four," he glanced at his watch. "And it's 4:24."

"Ugh, fine." Though she tilted her head back on the bench, angrily staring at the sky.

Peter pumped his fist in the air in victory. "It won't be _that_ bad, MJ."

"Nuh uh loser, you're forcing me to do this so I take away your right to call me MJ," she huffed.

Peter stared at her for a moment with his big doe eyes before she broke again. "Fine. You know, you have too much power over me and Ned."

"I know right. It's great isn't it. And look, our ride is here m'lady." MJ swats him with her book and an ' _ow!'_ is heard before the scene changes.

It opens in the (obvious) Avengers Tower's kitchen. "Welcome to Peter Parker's Pranks. This is my guest MJ."

"Co-host," she interjected.

"But-" at the girl's stare he closed his mouth and returned to the task at hand.

"We're in the Avenger's Tower kitchen. We couldn't risk Thor breaking in so we're in Steve's kitchen. He won't mind," Peter said. "We're pulled multiple pranks on them all using the materials given to us."

He leaned behind the island and brought a bag from a local convenience store. He emptied the contents revealing salt, baking soda, flour, MMs, lemons, cookies, and skittles.

"May the odds be ever in your favor and let the games begin," he said dramatically, waving a wooden mixing spoon in the air. Even MJ's lips were quirked up, amused. This would be interesting.

The next time the video started it was on a bookshelf. Peter was sitting on the couch, he had a bowl of brightly colored candies sitting on his lap. A movie, Star Wars, was playing on the TV while Peter pretended to look entranced by it. But the second someone entered the room his eyes darted to see who is was.

"Hey Steve," he greeted politely to his next victim. Tony, thinking maybe Peter pranking was just a one-time thing, didn't care to inform the others. Also, they'd probably never let him live it down that he got pranked by a fifteen year-old.

"Hey Pete," he greeted back politely as well. Of all the Avenger's Steve had the best manners. "Do you happen to know where your dad is?" An innocent question

"He's _not my dad_ ," why does everyone think he's my dad, Peter fumed. "And ask FRIDAY. But before you go, wanna watch with me?"

"I really shouldn't. I just need to-"

"Come on, I leave tomorrow, and right now I have a once in a lifetime chance to watch Star Wars with _Captain America_ ," he said, laying on the awkward, star struck, teen charm.

Steve looked hesitant for a second before his eyes met Peter's. Then he sighed and stated, "I suppose I could stay for a little. FRI, could you send Tony those stats?"

"Of course Mr. Rodgers," the AI said. That AI knew exactly what was happening, she also seemed to enjoy letting Peter prank the various Avengers that crossed the teen's path. As long as the pranks were harmless, she didn't mind.

The blonde sat down next to Peter, a pillow separating them. He sat stiffly, like a board, since he didn't know what was going on.

Peter bit his lip and asked, "Have you seen any of these movies?"

"The first, I believe," he responded.

"Is it interesting seeing how far animation and special effects have become?" Peter asked honestly.

"It is," Steve said. He seemed to be relaxing in his seat more now.

"Candy?" Peter offered.

Steve hesitated before nodding. Like Peter was hoping he took a small handful and popped them into his mouth.

Suddenly the super solider coughed. Peter watched as his brow furrowed in confusion. "Is that chocolate?" Peter nodded. "And fruit candy?" Peter nodded again. "Why?" Peter didn't answer instead a smirk overtook his face.

Steve just swallowed (though it looked like he had difficulty thanks to the taste). Then he turned to Peter. "You're definitely Stark's kid."

Then he stood and left. Peter fumed silently for a minute before resuming his movie and carefully picking through his candy. Then he turned to the camera. "That was not the reaction I was hoping for. File under ' _Try Again_ '."

The next time the screen came in a bathroom with Peter carefully filling a toothpaste tube with a horrid mixture of baking soda and lemon juice with a funnel. Then he gave a thumbs up, grabbed the camera, and dashed away.

The video came back to Steve's kitchen. Both teenagers were covered in flour. MJ was looking disapprovingly at the rows of 'poptarts' on the tray. "These look horrible," she stated, turning to dump them down the trash can... Again.

"No, wait!" Peter took the tray of bubbly looking square pastries from her hands. "Maybe they'll look better once we put on icing."

MJ shrugged. "You do you, looser. But I am wondering. Who are you hoping to fool?"

"Thor," he answered.

MJ blinked twice. "So you're hoping to tick off a literal god. With your Impostertarts?"

"Well when you put it like that..."

"Exactly," she said, trying to talk some sense into her genius, but oftentimes idiotic friend.

"Let's at least put the frosting on before they get too cold. It won't glaze."

MJ huffed. Sense was getting her nowhere. "Hand me a pipping bag." Peter smiled and she fought the urge to shield her eyes. Instead she took the bag and set to work on making these presentable.

The next prank was simpler. The camera was behind a jar, facing a pack of cookies left on the opposite counter at an angle. Suddenly, the unsuspecting victim walked into the kitchen in the form of Tony, again.

He yawned, it was likely really late. His eyes landed on the package of Oreos. He looked around before he carefully opened the package. He grabbed one to go and started rooting around his fridge for something.

He pulled back for a second and absent-mindedly took a large bite of the Oreo. Which he them immediately spat out the cookies and filling (which now composed of lemon juice and baking soda mixed with a little water) onto the floor.

After spitting one last time into the sink, apparently satisfied that he'd gotten the taste out of his mouth he turned on the room. His eyes tracing all the possible locations that would have the best views of the package until he found the hidden camera.

He sauntered forwards and grabbed the camera's. "Stay tuned. Up next, how to prank the pranker." He had a wolf-like smile on his face before turning the screen off.

~•~0~•~

 _Maybe because he is your dad Petey._

 _Bwahaha! Food pranks are the best way to go._ _Unless someone's allergic._

 _Then it's not funny._

 _The revenge sequel will be after this chap and just a warning it be kinda short. But keep an eye out for that. I may eventually give the chapters names to make it easier. I do plan on branching out from the Avengers. And I have an ending planned... It gets worse. So much worse._

 _Word: 1,400_

 **The Hawkster: Hawkeye. Clint Barton.**


	3. Episode III

**Episode III**

 **Tony Strikes Back**

* * *

The camera turns on to face a smirking Tony Stark. Anyone watching may have wondered how Tony Stark got hold of some teenager's camera. Behind him was a kitchen, a messy little one, obviously not one of the over-sized Tower ones. As one of the embroidered towels read, it belonged to the Parker's. There was a stack of about a dozen chocolate chip cookies in the background beside the man.

"Welcome to Tony Stark pranks back. Sorry Underoos, you brought this onto yourself," he winked and gave a magazine worthy smile then switched off the camera.

When the screen flickered back to life the setting hadn't changed, but it was obviously much later in the day this time. A clock on the counter showed 4:00pm. In the kitchen where two people, one was Tony Stark, and the other was a woman with long brown hair and glasses. They were chatting and making small talk when a door on the edge of the screen opened.

"Hey Aunt May... And Mr. Stark?" There was a slight edge of nervousness at seeing his mentor.

"Hey Pete," the woman greeted. "Tony came over for dinner."

Peter eyed Tony suspiciously. They both knew his Aunt's cooking wasn't the best. And May always insisted on cooking for Tony if he was there. Peter shook his head in warning, telling his mentor to leave his Aunt out of this. He went to put away his bag. Tony was grinning at Peter as the teen left the room. The inventor winked at the camera as May started speaking to Peter.

"Hey Peter, Tony brought some cookies over for you because you did so well at the internship. I think the meatloaf is done," his Aunt whispered that last part to herself. She stood and walked past Peter ruffling his hair as she passed, not noticing the look of growing horror on the teen's face. "I'm very proud of you."

Peter turned to look at his mentor. There had done nothing extraordinary at all this week so Tony was lying. Still, he couldn't refuse because then his Aunt would wonder why. He'd never been one to turn down anything with sugar in it and mentally cursed his sweet-tooth.

"O-okay, May," he said, staring at the cookies.

"You okay Pete?" She asked, frowning. "You seem a little pale."

"Fine," he replied quickly, too quickly. "I'm just fine. Tired, and uh, I have a lot of... Homework to get done." Lie. He had it all done before he even got home.

Tony rolls his eyes and wonders how his kid ever managed to keep a secret. He's a terrible liar. The inventor gave the teen a smirk that said 'nice try'. "Sit down Parker. Have a cookie."

"I-I'm good, but th-thanks," Peter said.

"Ouch, that hurts my feelings underoos. You know I put a lot of care and love into these and you'd reject them like this?"

There was grin was trying to creep its way onto Tony's face as Peter sat back down and cautiously took one of the cookies. He sniffed it and couldn't smell anything extremely off with it.

Peter finally took notice of his mentor's barely controlled laughing. "What'd you do to these?" He pointed to the plate.

"Don't talk with your mouth full," Tony's grin was so mischievous even Loki would be proud. "Two words; cricket. Flour."

"You didn't," Peter's muffled voice held as much betrayal as his eyes, which were wide in horror. His mouth was still full though. He could barely taste the cookies in his current state of shock.

"Oh, but I did," Tony's smug smile appeared again.

Peter turned and spat out the cookies into the sink. "Oh my god, I'm going to go throw up." With that he took off for the bathroom. Tony visibly winced. Okay, that prank may have been a bit extreme. Though he was tired of the constant pranks from Peter.

He turned back to the camera. "And remember this next time you prank me." He turned to leave in the direction May had gone to follow Peter, but swiveled back to switch the camera off.

* * *

The camera changed screen to the Avengers' kitchen. Standing in front of it were two teenagers, Peter and MJ, who seemed to be in the last bit of an argument.

"Welcome back to Peter Parker's Pranks! I'm here with my co-host MJ. And today we be pranking the one and only thunderous Avenger, Thor."

"Tony, when you find this video attached to Peter's lightning-fried corpse, I would like to state that I thought this was an absolutely terrible idea."

"Wow. Really MJ? I'm editing that part out," Peter glares at his co-host. He does not, in fact, edit that part out.

"Hey, you're the one that fell for Tony's trick. Who knows what types of revenge pranks there are on Asgard."

Ignoring MJ, Peter turns back to the camera. "I will be staying away from pranking Tony for a few days. But he is not safe from my pranks yet."

MJ snorted and rolls her eyes. "Just tell your imaginary audience about your 'brilliant' plan."

Peter grinned a rather menacing one. "Plan ' _Impostertarts_ ', the loving nickname given by MJ, is finally ago."

Peter picks up the camera and points it towards MJ. In her hands she holds an old Poptarts box, except now it was full of Impostarts. Peter takes the offered box and swaps it out with an already open, mostly empty one. There are at over thirty boxes of Poptarts just in the shot. The bait had been laid and the camera switches off.

When it comes back on the kitchen was dark, obviously late at night because the camera's night vision was switched on. At first it's unclear what the video is supposed to be seeing since it seemed one else was around... And then a silent shadow moved forwards. Not making a sound.

They opened the pantry and quickly grabbed the first box he saw which happened to be already open. Eagerly the figure opens one of the packages and took a big bite. There was a loud sound of surprise and the light switch flipped up. It was Clint Barton, aka Hawkeye and the unofficial prankster of the Avengers.

Clint spat out the pastry (if it could be called that) into his hand and flung it into the trash with disgusted expression. "What is _wrong_ with this?" He asked aloud and glaring at rest of the tainted Poptart accusingly.

The man lifted the pastry up to his mouth and gave a cautious lick. Baking powder? Molasses filling with lemon?

"... _Prank_?" Clint tilted his head in a confused, bird-like way. The were cogs turning in his head.

Clint knew Tony wouldn't endanger his Tower with another prank war. Nor did he think the billionaire would think of something like this. This was done by someone with skills. Though their decorating abilities could use some work. Clint guessed the only reason he'd eaten it was because he had barely been able to see his hand in front of his face.

Natasha was currently on a mission, so it couldn't be her. Clint couldn't think of any of the Tower's residents that would have the abilities for this.

Hadn't Steve said something about being pranked by someone? Parker. Peter Parker, if Clint remembered the introduction correctly. The hyper little arachnid kid Tony had practically adopted.

It seemed there was another prankster in the building. Clint threw away the Poptart with a disgusted and admiring look on his face.

There wasn't room for another prankster in this tower. Clint stalked away, not yet leaving the camera's view. Something was forming in his head as to how he can fend off his competition.

Was he petty enough to get revenge on a _fifteen year-old_?

Yes.

But that sounded bad. He was _avenging_ everyone who had been pranked by this kid. _That_ sounded better.

* * *

Okay so it's been a hot minute since I've updated this. I'd like to apologize. 2019 gave me whiplash, and I'm trying to be recover from that. (I _will_ be finishing this story this year, there will be about 20 chapters). Now I also have an Ao3, I plan to cross-post this.

I was inspired to do Tony's prank by the YouTuber EmmyMadeInJapan who made, if I remember right, cookies out of cricket flour (which is in fact a real thing, you're welcome). But she said they tasted fine. Plus the idea of Peter unknowingly eating bugs (and finding it good) is really funny to me.

I promise I'm moving away from doing so many food pranks now. But you can send me ideas on my Tumblr Calm-is-overrated or leave them in the comments!


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